My phone began to ring as I try to dose off. I wasn't fully conscious, I was half-asleep as I tried to grab my phone on the bedside table. My eyes were tired to open, my head still spinning with alcohol. The number was random as the light flashed on my eyes, it wasn't registered. Who would it be?
"Hello, who's this and do you have any idea what time is it?"
"Yes, I'm sorry to bother you at this time."
It was a voice a woman.
"It's okay. Who is this, by the way?"
"You don't need to know who I am, but the last call registered on his phone was your number. So I tried to call you."
"You know who I'm talking about. I don't know you and you don't know me, let's keep it that way. I just called to say that he just got into a terrible accident. He's on the hospital right now trying to survive."
I cleared my throat and wiped my eyes as I try to digest all the words my mysterious caller just said. How could it happen? Why? Where? How? I had a lot of questions in my mind.
"Tell me he's gonna be okay."
"I wish I could, but the doctors just said it's a 50-50 chance. I'll call you again when we confirm what should happen."
And then the line just stopped. My head finally cleared up I can't think properly right now, I can't fathom the fact you can be gone in any second. I went straight to the kitchen, still in my underpants, to grab water and try to exhale. What could've happened? What if I just let you stay? Our last conversation was just two hours ago while you were still on a friend's party.
"Just let me fix this. I'll give my best this time. Just.. please."
"You know people who aren't strong enough to let go? I would always assume that I am one of them. But right now, I don't know. I'm tired of trying to make this work out."
"What do you want me to do?"
"I want this to work out. But I think I'm giving up."
"Hey! Please don't give up."
"I want to fight, but I'm tired. I keep trying, but I constantly fail. I'll call you again."
And now, I'm regretting every word I said. I realized I was there for 15 minutes, staring blankly at nowhere. Then my phone began to ring again. I just quickly grabbed it and pressed the little green button without looking who would it be.
"Hey, it's me."
The voice was crystal clear. It was you. How can you talk to me when you're in the hospital?
"How can this happen? Someone called me and said you were in a terrible accident."
"She's over-reacting. I'm fine now."
"But she said you're 50-50!"
"Again, over-reacting. Just listen."
I can't say a thing. I didn't care if this was true or not, as long it's you and your voice.
"I'm sorry I was never enough. I'm sorry I didn't try to work this out. I'm sorry for every pain I've caused you. I know saying this isn't enough. But you made me the happiest man in the world. All the love I gave, all the love I know, it's all because of you."
"You know what's the last words you said to me?"
"Hey! Please don't give up."
I heard you chuckle for a while, but still, the seriousness in your tone is irrevocable. It was then I realized I was sobbing.
"I want you know that no matter what happens, I will always be the man that will fight for you. I wish I can see you right now, I'll hug you and never let you go. Only if I could...."
The line got cut the moment you said those last words. I was just there, crying my heart out. After 5 minutes, someone called again.
"I've been trying to call you but your phone seems busy."
"I was just talking to him."
"How's that possible when...."
She started to cry as I hear her struggling to breath on the line.
"When he's gone now."
I dropped the phone.