I try to think of other things then I end up fucking my mind up and go back to that idea. It’s not the best idea in the world, but I swear it feels good. Then I go back to my bed, as fucked up as it is, knowing that I can’t sleep. Then I end up listening to music that really fucks my soul up and makes me alive at the same time. I try to think of anything. Why I feel nothing, why I’m stuck in this dug hole, why I can’t get myself up and just walk again.
And it’s like this most of the time.